Monday, February 9, 2009

I didn't know I cared.

I feel the need to apologize, if not you the reader but to myself. I can't help but feel just oh-so-slightly guilty over choosing the following subject for my first post. I feel a little sad that it is not the happiest moments that have inspired me to blog. Not that I don't intend to blog about everything sparkly-unicorn-pink-rainbows and glitter wonderful. I do. However, I have to get this off my chest. It is too heavy for me to bear.

Maybe its my age... maybe its the sign of the times. I can't remember ever reading the business section of a newspaper before. Nor can I recall having ever more than skimmed a political column. Yet I found myself engrossed this weekend. I blame Michael Moore. The man who produced the Health Crisis movie, SICKO. I watched it. Accidentally we found it surfing channels. I was appalled. I cried. My husband cried. And for the first time in my life, I felt ashamed to be an American. Yes, I said it. Shame. Logically, I know that it is only one mans point of view. Logically, I know that productions such as that are created to pull the viewer away from the whole picture. Logically, I know, that he used only the saddest of tales and woe to represent his ideals. But in my heart, I know its all true.

I have always put up a mental block when it came to politics. I have always known (thanks to my VERY astute 12th grade Government teacher) that the ONLY thing that drives politics is money. I have never voted for that exact reason. No politician truly believes in change. No politician truly believes in "his people". They DO believe in that lobbyists they carry around in their very large pockets. They DO believe in furthering themselves financially. They do believe in getting their proposed bills through the senate for their own personal gain. THEREFORE I DO NOT believe in them.

But I was a coward. I never spoke out about my views. I hid underneath the umbrella with the rest of the masses, shaking, wondering if this giant governmental machine was going to magically transform into something different. Praying for my family, praying for others. But never once speaking about what I believed. This ends today.

I believe in the fundamentals of Democracy. I really, truly do. And they have gone terribly wrong here in America. Terribly, terribly wrong. GREED runs this country. FEAR runs this country. In the Bible, Revelations specifically, it is prophesied that Babylon will fall again. I have often pondered where was this modern day Babylon? Dafur? Iraq? The Vatican? No, I know where it is... and I live here. Right smack dab in the middle of it all.

I am not scared... I believe the Lord will take his people home. Whether we live through the tribulation, or whether he snatches us up first makes no difference to me. I know where I am going, and I know how it will end. I also know that I no longer have to keep quiet about my ideals and beliefs. The ONE thing that they cannot take from me IS my freedom of speech. Cliche, I know. But truth just the same. I won't lie. It saddens me to have finally understood that my voice will never be heard. That positive change will never be made. That my Children may very well be forced to see the end days before they even got the opportunity to see the beauty of this world. I addition to keeping them healthy, strong, happy and loved, my job will be to show them that there is always good among bad. Always happiness among the sad. And that can be found in Faith.


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