Im only a little crazy...

That really lifted my spirits. First was my Doctor YES! My actual doctor! Not his nurse or his front desk person. He was so kind... just asking how we were holding up, and apologized for everything we had to got through. i was amazed to say the least! And the good news is, he sees no reason why we couldn't try again after two cycles. I am not saying that I will be ready for that emotionally, but its great to know that my doctor has confidence that this was an isolated incident and that I am not broken. At least not physically.

The second call was my Dad. We talked for a long time. He is sending us some money, which we so desperately need right now!!! Its been so hard getting through this slow down time. We really depend on those commission checks to keep us above water, and when they are only $100 or less, well, we sink. Thank you to my Father and the Lord, for him opening his wallet and helping us out. I cannot wait until I am able to do the same for others. Believe me, when I have the money to give, I am GONNA GIVE!

And, some TMI, but its my blog so I can say what I want! I have not pooped since Friday. I am not happy about this AT ALL. Dulcolax and colon cleanser have not done anything at all... BUT this morning I did go a little, which I am so happy about. The last thing I need right now is constipation and hemmies flaring up! I am almost out of pain meds!

Yesterday was so freaking hard. I went on PG.ORG, and I just started balling the minute I opened the page. I had to close it. I will be back ladies, but right now it just wrenches my heart.

I also put away all of my maternity clothes. That started a 1.5 hour crying jag. That was almost as hard as burying her... I guess its the symbolism of it. That, and the fact that maternity wear is the ONLY clothing I have purchased for myself in the last 6 years, so my wardrobe is SAD SAD SAD. Shabby and out of date as can be. No wonder I never leave my house.

BUT the garage sale is getting bigger by the minute! I finally sat down and FORCED myself to get rid of more of Everits clothes, lol. I am such a nostalgic dweeb. I want to hang onto every little thing because I remember how cute he looked in it. Well, I did good. I kept quite a few still, things I could use for another baby (unisex stuff) and of course my absolute favorites. I pray this sale is a success and brings us the money we need!!!